Big day for the children in the hills and a pretty big one for me too...

Managing Editor David Whaley’s “Keep Smiling” journey through throat cancer

FRIDAY, January 16, is going to be a significant date. That is when the Education Funding Agency has indicated it will be ready to release the findings of its inquiry into the possible siting for the much-needed new Saddleworth School building.

Oh, yes and it is also the date for my cancer op!

So while my colleagues will be putting the finishing touches to hotly-awaited news that will affect generations of Saddleworthians to follow, I will be taking things ‘easy’ on the operating-theatre table in Manchester Royal Infirmary.

We were back down there this last week for the pre-op assessments.

Wendy and myself had a lengthy meeting with speech therapist Frances, clinical nurse Phil and dietician Hannah.

We talked through swallowing techniques that we all take for granted so that I could really get the sensations and mechanisms locked into my brain for when I am doing this somewhat differently post-op.

I can’t say I have ever really noticed that you push your tongue to the roof of your mouth just as you are about to swallow (try it... see!)

And when you have that tablet to take how you go for that “big” swallow —likened to lifting it over the edge? Well that’s the action they want me to go for. Note to memory.

It will be some days post-op before I am even able to take liquids and the fitting of a feeding tube into my stomach will be a few days prior to the operation.

It’s called a percutaneous endoscopic gastronomy (or PEG for short). I won’t work out the Scrabble score in case I get it wrong again!

The doctors had contemplated performing my operation as early as Monday, January 5 but to keep the holiday intact (as I said last week I am only taking my golf clubs to keep my mate, Mike, company, honest) that would have necessitated having the PEG fitted pre-Christmas.

I don’t think the nurses were too happy about that.

a: I would have to stay away from any pool or the sea.

b: I would have to keep it clean while in foreign climes.

c: If something went wrong and I came back with an infection it would be rather costly to have to stand down at short notice all those experts gathered in the theatre.

So Professor Jarrod Homer’s cycle of Friday-Monday operations every other week means he is next in action on the 16th ... I might well be in by the 14th to fit the feeder.

The great man himself called in for a chat, fresh from a presentation to the University Trust board, and was just as bullish about the operation and my suitability for it than he was a fortnight ago when he first convinced us this was the way to go.

The Prof’s off skiing — I bet he does the black runs too, just for a bit of light relief. Now I know why he didn’t fancy me being done before Christmas and who can blame him. Even top surgeons deserve a holiday in this crazy NHS, don’t they?

Other discussions with the team surrounded such matters as how the feeding-tube system actually works.

Can you believe they can even flavour the liquid feed so that you get to taste vanilla or banana if you burp. I asked for fish and chips. Well a Northern lad has to try!

Clinical nurse Phil talked about what the first few hours and days would be like — he even took us to the ward where I am likely to be and the High Dependency Unit (HDU) where I will be taken immediately from theatre.

We are beginning to get our bearings at MRI. On floors like level 2 it is just one long corridor that goes from MRI to the Eye Hospital, to St Mary’s to the Children’s Hospital.

As we go off for the ward visit, Frances realises she won’t see me again until after the op and observes “see you on the other side”.

My startled look told her I had not read that comment quite as she intended. I plan to be breathing and ready for her coaching that’s for sure.

I really must stop winding up these professional people - especially as they have my life in their hands.

Back in pre-op assessment we go into a series of rooms to answer detailed health questions, have blood pressure taken (normal again which surprises them) and to be swabbed.

I had done the MRSA swabs in nose and groin before prior to the biopsies and aborted laser operation but found being handed a long swab to stick up the rear something of an eye opener. Apparently it is to combat a sister bug to MRSA. I bet that’s a short straw in the testing lab.

Last stop was to visit a very chirpy nurse who did my ECG. She took too much delight in removing the pads and body hair but did it all with a smile.

Passed that too. Blimey I am beginning to think their tags of ‘young’ and ‘fit’ might be true after all. Then I look in the mirror and reality delivers a telling blow.

But we remain upbeat. That night we attend our second carol concert in a week. I think I could be on ‘Top of the Pops’ soon as my miming skills are improving. Is that still going?

This time it was with the Oldham Police Division’s celebrations and the packed church did their best to raise the roof of St John’s, Failsworth with my moral if not vocal support.

It was while chatting afterwards in the church hall that a certain female Oldham councillor who shall remain nameless gave me a pep talk to remember.

She assured me I was going to come out of this with flying colours and said all I had to do was call and she would be down to the hospital to administer a bed bath!

Really! Will I ever be able to look at her across the council chamber again without the image of Hattie Jacques in “Carry on Doctor” flashing into my mind!

Many of the Christmas cards have had extra messages of support which give us great support for what is ahead.

One was a card is signed by the past captains at Saddleworth GC (the golfing family really is strong as I play at rivals Werneth) and I promise to be back up there in the summer. There are fewer better views in golf in this country than stood on the 14th tee at Mountain Ash on a summer’s day looking across the valley to Dovestones.

And my Amigos at my own club have set me a target to be striding on the fairways real soon by putting my initials on a new pair of shiny red and white shoes (yes, golfers do wear some funny gear).

Another of the cards contained two wooden “Keep Smiling” speech bubbles that Wendy and I now carry in our purse and wallet. So thoughtful.

And so I pause in these musings. Can the Whaleys wish you all a magical Christmas and hope that 2015 bring us all what we wish for.

I will, hopefuly, meet you on the other side.

KEEP SMILING :-)