Don’t suffer in silence

Date published: 22 June 2015


IN the wake of the Ali sentence, one of his victims has spoken of her ordeal.

Iqbal Ali’s third victim, whom he met at university when she was 18, suffered years of abuse at his hands.

The woman cannot be named for legal reasons - we call her Jane to protect her anonymity - said: “At first he was loving and charming: everything a girl could want. He wanted to spend every day with me, so I stopped seeing my friends.”

He moved in at her address, which was when the abuse began.

Jane said: “At first it was mental, telling me I wasn’t good enough, I was ugly, stupid, worthless, and he was doing me a favour by being with me. I began to believe him. Then the hitting started, and the reasons varied. It got to the point where I wasn’t allowed to go to the bathroom without his permission. We moved into a flat together and the beatings got worse. Some times he used weapons, other times his fist.”

Jane says she became adept at lying to her family to explain visible bruises: “I was ashamed that I let this happen to me. I suffered severe depression and could see no way out.”

Jane found he courage to speak to a work colleague about her ordeal, and finally made the decision not to go home to Ali.

She says: “The support I received was astonishing. I got out. It is possible, it takes a lot of courage but there are people out there who will help. My plea to anyone out there suffering any kind of abuse, is do not suffer in silence.

“Speak out. If you don’t, the next time your partner hits you it could kill you.”