Euro so afraid of Iron Chancellor

THE FRIDAY THING: YOU have to hand it to the Germans, they may not be the best in the world at winning wars but when it comes to football, grabbing all the best poolside chairs and putting the squeeze on the rest of Europe without dropping a bomb they really are the king or should that be the kaiser!

Angela Merkel, the German Chancellor might not have designs on becoming the Empress of Europe but she gives a very good impression of viewing politicians from every other European state (including, sadly, our own outwitted bunch) as pawns on her personal chess board.

A political dominatrix then (could she be a friend of Max Mosley, I wonder) brushing aside these fawning male politicians, a wet and miserable bunch it seems to me, for no other reason than she can.

So while Cameron dreams of a referendum to distance us from Europe and its problems (especially for him), Angela prepares to take over the economies of Eurozone countries and has her course set on a European super state ruled by, well, Angela and the acolytes (sounds like a pop group but one that strikes a discordant note to British ears). Where’s Cheryl when we need her?

So should we be preparing to ditch the pound and welcome the euro with open wallets and purses?

German’s finance minister, one Wolfgang Schauble (wasn’t he in “Sound of Music”) tells everyone who will listen that Britain will become a euro spending nation “faster than people think”. And Herr Schauble also insists that a special tax will be introduced which might well wipe out the stock exchange in the City of London.

And, lest you think I exaggerate, Sir John Major (former PM and sleeping partner of Edwina Curry, and we should not let his choice of girl friend detract from his worldly wisdom) says that the attack on the stock exchange is a “heat-seeking missile proposed on continental Europe, aimed at the City of London”. Metrolink has performed a similar role in Oldham, methinks.



YOU may recall my piece some time ago about the X-ray full body scanners in use at airports and how they would attract a certain kind of exhibitionist, anxious to expose his (for it is always a he) hidden (until now) charms to the world.
Well these scans are to become compulsory at all airports in order, so the story goes, to catch would-be terrorists who carry explosive devices in their underwear. Now anyone who has ever had a chicken vindaloo and eleventeen pints of JW Lees finest will most certainly be carrying an explosive device in their underwear and woe betide anyone within sniffing distance when it is released.

The proud (cocky, one might say if one was that sort of person) and the bashful will view the full-body scanner differently, of course.



I CONFESS to being bemused by the decision by, believe it or not, Mr Justice Bean (was it Rowan Atkinson having a laugh) that it is all right to swear at policemen because they hear so much bad language that they are no longer offended by it.
Police officers are, unfortunately, often physically abused, too, especially at protests and demonstrations, so does Mr Justice Bean (you have to laugh don’t you) think that it is OK to go on attacking them with petrol bombs, bricks, bottles and shop door frames?

Police officers may not be caused harassment, alarm or distress by words that are all too commonly part of everyday vocabulary by people of all ages and all cultures in any and every public place these days, but whatever happened to respect?

Does Justice Bean not realise that by attaching no sanction to offensive language he is playing his part in removing the whole notion of respect from society. Will he sanction the use of such language in his court? Bumbling Mr Bean wouldn’t, I bet.



FINAL WORD: I don’t doubt for a second that the controlling Labour group on Oldham Council is dedicated to ensuring that Oldham has a theatre in the town centre. Not only is it the cultural hub of the borough but it performs amazing outreach work, taking the excitement and the learning experience of theatre into the broader community. A new theatre is what we need.