Time to spare the carrots

THE FRIDAY THING: ONE of the downsides that perhaps puts a lot of people off going into teaching (apart from having to sell your soul to the teaching unions) is how you go about keeping a classroom full of know-it-all teenagers from staging their version of a riot or the warring antics of the Syrian army, especially as a machine gun, a Rottweiler or a Taser are probably against the ’elf and safety rules..

Surprisingly (well, it surprises me as it played a big part in my schooldays) detention is no longer used as a disciplinary tool by an overwhelming majority of teachers.

Corporal punishment is also off the curriculum, of course. One teacher of my acquaintance used a size 16 gym shoe to keep his classes in line; another threw chalk at miscreants and there was one chap who threw the implement they used to clean what was then called a blackboard, before blackboard was blacklisted by the PC brigade, just before nursery rhymes that mentioned anything to do with black.

With no detention and no corporal punishment and certainly no sending unruly louts to the head’s office for a stern lecture and an introduction to the cane and/or strap, preferably both, schools are now said to use systems of reward and praise to promote good behaviour.

And no, I haven’t made that up.

Research shows bad behaviour in class is forcing many teachers to leave. Charlie Taylor, the expert adviser on pupil behaviour, says: “We need to ensure trainee teachers are equipped with the right training in behaviour management.” A bit of training in judo, karate and knife-throwing and target practise might be preferable.

There was no behaviour management when I was at school. Life was simpler then: carrot and stick - only they were out of carrots.

And they don’t use many carrots in Wiltshire where school truants are visited by police, hauled out of bed and escorted to their classes. Whether the snoozing truants have time to change out of their pyjamas the police aren’t saying.

Tony Blair would be a good candidate for detention (about 20 years, I reckon). As a nation we were harmed by the former PM’s decision to send an open invitation to everyone in Eastern Europe to come over here to get a job.

Blair still believes he was right and doesn’t accept that his open-door policy robbed thousands of British people of jobs, and thus did untold damage to the economy of the country and to the living standards of thousands of UK citizens.

Labour leader Ed Miliband admits his party got it wrong, was worried about being thought of as racist, and did not listen to concerns that Britain was being flooded by immigrants.

The figures speak for themselves. There are currently 4.06 million foreign-born people employed in the UK: there has been a 49,000 net rise in the employment of foreigners in the last year and a net fall in employment of UK nationals of 43,000.

Miliband has it right when he says: “People who worry about immigration, talk about immigration and think about immigration are not in any way bigots.”

At last a politician who expresses a sane and sensible view on a topic that does cause a lot of people real concern.



FINAL WORD: Is the latest pet trend going to catch on in Oldham?
We have had dogs bred to fit in ridiculously expensive and bejewelled handbags and now we have technicolor dogs.

Emma Watson, one of the Harry Potter film stars, had a tiny white dog called Darcy that would certainly fit in a medium-sized shoulder bag, but sensibly spends most of his time walking on a lead.

Emma, however, wanted Darcy to stand out so she spent £90 on having him dyed pink.

A friend has a dog called Casper that goes into Groom Dog City (in London, needless to say) for a blue Mohican cut and dye. Barking mad the lot of them, I say. Where’s the RSPCA when you need them?


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