So, Jacko’s dead. But hey, life goes on

SO Michael Jackson is dead. That’s sad isn’t it?

A great performer is no longer with us. That’s very sad.

So yes it’s sad that a man, who really should have been very much in his prime of life, suffered a heart attack and died, but I’d just like to remind people that heart attacks are quite common.

Quite a few happen every day, to normal people.

Okay, so not everyone has sold billions of records worldwide, turned their life into a travelling circus and dodged some very serious criminal allegations but lord, aren’t you glad?

I’d be exhausted just getting up in the morning.

And what a family? Underneath all that weeping and wailing there appears to be some terribly dark undercurrents and its all to do with money.

Did he have any left? Where did he stash it? Can we all get a bit? Its all “so Hollywood”.

I’ll admit, “Doctor My Eyes” by the Jackson 5 is definitely one of the greatest dance records of all time, and yes “ABC” is great and “Blame It On The Boogie” is a showstopper, but then it all went slightly downhill for me.

With the extreme change in his appearance came desperate reports from Neverland. I mean, come on, “Neverland?”

Did nobody read the signs?

I understand he had a very harsh upbringing, but there are many people who do.

I understand he felt that he had missed out on adolescence and wanted to surround himself with the joys of childhood, but there aren’t many kids on my estate with a pet chimp and a rollercoaster.

I’m so sorry if I sound harsh but there’s a little bit of the Diana/Jade Goody syndrome going on here.

Yes, they were famous, and yes, they died, but goodness me we’re all going to in the end.

I do feel it a shame that there are so many people willing to mourn so publicly for a man they never met.

His music may have touched their lives, after all that is what music is for, but surely that should be celebrated.

My advice: Stop bewailing a man who churned out a few hits and go out there and form real relationships with real people who live with you in the real world, because that’s one thing Jackson never did and that, to me, is the saddest thing of all.