Talent show is a huge turn-off

CHANNEL HOPPING: BRITAIN’S Got the Pop Factor and Possibly a New Celebrity Jesus Christ Soapstar Superstar Strictly on Ice.

In the world of the all-singing, all-dancing, vote-them-off musical talent show, Peter Kay just about covered it with Geraldine, right?

Wrong . . . and how. Enter “Popstar to Operastar”.

“X Factor” boasts Simon Cowell — Pop to Op has Lawrence Llewelyn-Bowen. For “Strictly” host Bruce Forsyth read PTO’s Myleene Klass and Alan Titchmarsh. Dannii Minogue versus Meatloaf. Aside from the habitual sore throats and sob stories, the similarities really do end there.

And for an hour-and-a-half? Talk about an over-chore. What were ITV thinking? PTO? All the clues are right there in the title — Please Turn Over.


ROXY got the Vic but the who-bashed-Archie-on-his-bonce-with-the-pub-bust saga rolls on in “Enders”. Big Mo’s running a book on it. Odds-on favourite Janine is wavering after getting next to nowt in the will. Bradders didn’t do it, Peggy and Phil seem too obvious and the Mitchell sisters look safe. Mute barmaid Tracey was 100/1 with Mo — the Silent Assassin. What a surprise — Mo can spell assassin. That only leaves Ian Beale, who was seen dumping a laptop in the canal to the sound of a little Sting . . . appropriate really, The Police . . . it was a small PC.


MOLLY left poor Tyrone in “Corrie”. And the mechanic broke down. Just as well he didn’t take that job in Chester.

Sally’s cancer op meant so much to dad-in-law Bill, he suggested doing something “special” — as a family — when the ordeal was all over with.

“I was thinking . . . a weekend away,” said Bill.

OK, but you could sense maybe a fortnight abroad might have been nearer the mark. “Or a meal out somewhere.” Less good.

“A chippy tea, maybe.” Get well soon, Sal.


Soap roar: The superb “Street” duo Steve and Becky McDonald — their latest tiff looks like going the distance. Truly the Jack and Vera of their day.


Soap bore: Eddie Windass dumping his Weatherfield empties in the Websters’ wheelie bin. What a rubbish storyline — not a patch on his grenade cake for Gary: that went down a bomb.