A puzzle fit for finishing

THE ART OF JIGSAWS: Nothing says retirement home quite like a wooden board and a half-done jigsaw.

Cast among the old dears, pot plants and custard creams, you can’t help but wonder if it will ever get finished.

That, after all, is a jigsaw’s destiny and it’s a responsibility jigsawers shouldn’t take lightly.
To you, clipping individual pieces into place may just seem like a crazy, adrenaline-filled night in but, to the jigsaw, it could be its one chance to ever feel complete.

And they take rejection hard, a bit like a man when he’s had a drink and misreads the signs before sauntering upstairs to find his wife is actually tucked up in bed in her comfy pyjamas.

If you think that’s disappointing, imagine how a jigsaw feels when someone puts a couple of edge pieces together and then decides they’d rather go an make some cheese on toast.

I’d suggest you should only embark upon a jigsaw if you’re committed to seeing it though. No-one is saying a 3,000-piece autumn forest scene is easy, it’s not supposed to be, but getting to the end will make it all worthwhile. If foot loose and fancy free is more your style, you’d be better suited to Scrabble.

So, set your stall out so you’ve got plenty of room and no disturbances. Perhaps put “Countdown” on in the background to create the right ambiance. I like to have a luke-warm cup of tea near-by for refueling.

Spread the jigsaw out on a solid and supportive surface (we’ll find out why later) and begin flipping the pieces over so the picture is facing up.

Find the corners, there should be four of those, and separate the edge pieces from those with character on all sides.

You then begin methodically, first completing the outer edge before working your way towards the middle. You may, on occasion, take time out to work on a particularly identifiable central section. Dedication and patience are vital but what you really need for success is a lump hammer.

Obviously you should begin any jigsaw fully intending to get every piece in the correct place but when that’s not working, it is acceptable practice to “encourage” them to fit.

I usually persuade any spare pieces to take up residence in the empty spaces and then touch them up with a bit of poster paint. All the jigsaw masters do it.

Whether it’s a five-piece Peppa Pig jigsaw or a 2,000-piece portrait of the Queen, the moment when you hammer in the final piece and sit back to admire your handy work is pretty special.

And there’s only one way to celebrate. How else, but with a party popper and a Werther’s Original?


Next week: The Art of Being Award-winning.