Who cares about male grooming?

WHAT KATI DID NEXT:

If you had a choice and on one hand was a gentleman who took very good care of himself, spending hours crimping and preening and on the other was a scruffy oik who couldn’t give a monkeys, indeed often smelled like monkeys, which one would you choose?

Now before you come to your conclusion let me put a few arguments forward.

He of the very good care spends hours in the bathroom, very often to the detriment of us, unless of course you have separate bathrooms which in itself is a little creepy.

He spends more money on products than we do, often to the detriment of us, bearing in mind that we will always have a twinge of guilt when we fork out £150 for a pot of Crème de la Mer moisturiser and trust me he never will.

He tweezes his facial hair, very often to the detriment of us, sending out very mixed messages regarding his sexuality.

He of the oik on the other hand spends no time in the shower, doesn’t wash himself or his clothes much and will always be waiting in the car for us to be ready. It’s not such a difficult choice now is it?

The reason why this question is swimming around in the bowl of my mind is that I saw a picture of David Beckham in the newspapers the other day.

Blimey, that man has far too much time on his hands or he has far too many hands on his face, them being the stylists, facialists and beauticians of this world.

If I had a working “gay-dar” it would be flashing bright red with a neon warning sign spinning like a dervish.

I mean, he’s good looking and all, I mean really good looking, but he’s incredibly scary as well.

How is it possible for a man to be that perfect if he doesn’t spend more time than Vicky in the bathroom . . . but they are bound to have separate ones aren’t they?

No, today I saw the new man in my life. “Dr Who”, Matt Smith, wandering the festivals sans T-shirt, very buff indeed, accompanied by a supermodel.

He has very obviously got the scruffy oik down to a tee and I know where my preference lies.

Now anyone know where I can hire a Dalek costume?