Learn with Kev: The Art of being Honest

Some people would say that honesty is the foundation on which a respectable society is built.

The idiots! They’ve obviously never left a shop before realising they’ve been given too much change. Woo hoo! You’re £1.73 up and you’ve stuck two fingers up to the corporate giants who rule our lives!

Unless it’s just a small family business then you may start to feel a bit bad as dive into your car and start the engine quicker than ever before.

The reason for this guilt is your conscience. It’s what hurts when all your other parts feel really good and it’s why a good majority of people stick to being honest more often than not.

Being honest implores you to be fair and just and deal in fact, not fiction. You shouldn’t cheat or steal and your word should be your bond. If possible you should as honest as the day is long. That’s a summer day, not one in December. You have to live and die by the sword of truthfulness, just ask any politician.

It’s not like you have much choice anyway because being honest was probably ingrained in your from a young age. It is drilled into children from the moment they start lying which is why telling lies is so much more exciting.

It doesn’t have to be all holier than thou righteousness though, because one of the best uses for honesty is to insult people. It has such a protective force that if you hide behind it you can say almost anything. “Can I be honest with you? I really used to hate you but now I just think you’re an idiot.” Mesmerised by your honesty, they’ll probably say they appreciate it.

Being “brutally honest” is the next rung up and should be used sparingly for things like shattering a person’s life’s dream. “To be brutally honest, you’re rubbish and you always have been.” As they attempt to pick up the pieces of their life and start again, they’ll probably reflect that your honesty had a refreshing quality about it.

When it comes to relationships, being honest is at the top of a woman’s wish life after jewellery, chocolates and surprise weekends away. Even when under pressure though, a man should never tell a woman that he’s unworthy of her love. She already knows.

There are times when honesty is not to be advised and poor judgement can have terrible consequences. Spare a thought for the man who ended up in casualty with a bloody nose and two black eyes. When the doctor asked him what had happened he reasoned that whoever said “honesty is the best policy” wasn’t married to a woman with a huge behind.
Next week: the Art of being Annoyed.