Dreaming of a good night’s sleep...

Isn’t sleeping brilliant. This wonderful thing we call sleep. My, if only the day were shorter and the night longer. Can we just imagine that for a minute, close your eyes everyone, lie back, take a deep breath and relaxzzzzzzzz.

What’s that? What? Oh sorry friends, I am awake. I just dozed off for a second. I’m not sleeping at the moment. Can you guess?

When I say I’m not sleeping, my boy isn’t sleeping and the general pattern is that when he doesn’t sleep I tend not to either.

It’s not a solidarity thing I assure you. I would happily roll over into the warmth of the duvet, snuggle up and dream sweet dreams but children appear to have the wrong impression about sleep and I for one, would like to know which child at toddler group is spreading this rumour.

It can’t be genetic. They know they have to breathe, they know they have to eat and they definitely know what a nappy is for, so who on earth, and I’m pointing a very stern finger at someone, told them they didn’t have to sleep.

This morning at 4am, when I am sure the milkmen of the world unite and enjoy the peace and quiet, I was sat on the end of the bed reading “The Snail and The Whale” and rocking back and forth.

It’s the rocking back and forth that gets you. I find myself drifting off into a joyous slumber just as the little one screams “Again, again” in my ear.

This afternoon in my sleepless haze, I dragged the boy wonder around the supermarket.

I forged my way through the female throngs cooing and aahing over him, which on a normal day fills me with pride, but today I was offering them hard cash to take him for the night like a deranged, there is no other word for it, a deranged “mother”.

They all smiled as if I was joking. I was not joking.

As I sit here writing this at 10pm having just got the bruiser to sleep and before you ask, no I’ve not eaten yet, yes the washing is sat by the machine and no I’ve not washed my hair in months, I dream of the sleep I could be getting. The bountiful goodness of shut-eye I’m missing. Right now. At this very minute.

So you know what? I’m going to go and get it. Goodnight.