Wheel turns full circle for crowing Aussies

SPORTS AND SHOWBIZ BETTING: FOUR years ago, while sporting my England cricket shirt, I strolled into a lift in an Australia hotel.

I was on my way to the final Test match of the Ashes series in Sydney with England 4-0 down and hurtling headlong towards another humiliating defeat.

Already in the lift was a hotel maintenance guy who clocked my shirt and declared with obvious relish: “Strewth mate, you’re a b****y glutton for punishment.”

I couldn’t argue at the time, but I really wish I could see that smirking Aussie today.

Because I would look him in the eye and say (in true Norwegian soccer-commentator style): “Rolf Harris, Kylie Minogue, Ned Kelly, Men At Work, Crocodile Dundee, Dame Edna Everage, Shane Warne - are you listening Shane Warne?

“Your boys took a hell of a beating, a hell of a beating!”

Right, I’ve got that off my chest and why not after 20-odd years of seeing our cricket team crushed Down Under?

An innings defeat of the old enemy in Adelaide went some way to repairing the damage of previous Ashes encounters, but with our lads currently in prime form in all aspects of the game and the Aussies in disarray, only a series win will suffice.

England are 4-9 to deliver just that, with the draw at 7-2 and Australia 6-1.

The third Test takes place in Perth, starting tomorrow week, and with Stuart Broad out of the tour with injury, I expect Chris Tremlett to replace him.

England are 13-8 to win at the WACA while Australia are 9-4 to perform a minor miracle and turn current form on its head completely.

The draw is a fair bet at 15-8, but the force is with England and now is the time to go for the jugular.


TALKING of massacres, there is plenty of carnage in Coronation Street this week – and the bookies are getting in on the act.
The tram disaster has prompted the odds-layers to open a market on who gets killed.

And poor Molly Dobbs is at the top of the list at 50-1 ON.

Ashley Peacock (1-25) is also on his way out, it seems, while others in danger of a trip to that cobbled street in the sky are Sunita (6-4), Peter and Norris (2-1), Rita (3-1), Ciaran (4-1), Chris (9-2) and the show’s comedy hero Graeme (8-1).


AS expected, Stacy Solomon justified odds-on favouritism in the horrific I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here.
But it’s a lot less cut and dried in the X Factor and Strictly Come Dancing. Matt Cardle is 10-11 to win the former, but favourites have a poor record in that show, a remark which also applies to Strictly, for which Matt Baker is the even-money jolly to triumph.

There are two evictions this weekend and the bookies reckon Gavin Henson and Scott Maslen are on their way out.


KEVIN Pietersen, tipped in this column at 9-2 to be top England batsman in the second Test, duly delivered the goods with his knock of 227.