The truth — it really is all in the mind

A while ago, I was watching the final of “Britain’s Got Talent” when a guy playing a saxophone said he’d always thought he was a loser who’d never amount to much.

Yet now he was on TV in front of millions of people, blowing the judges away with his talent.

On the other hand, I was sitting on the settee drinking tea, convinced that I was extra special and destined for greatness.

Talk about being deluded! Poor fella. And he’s not alone. So many people are deluded these days that it’s hard to find anyone who sees the world as I do.

Being deluded is a deception of the mind, it’s a self-imposed hoax. You’ve got to pull the wool over your own eyes and then lead yourself down the garden path with every intention of avoiding the truth.

It’s a tempting activity to pursue if you’re a positive person because it’s always nice to view the world as you would want it be rather than how it actually is.

Delusions of grandeur are the kind I would recommend. They’re much more fun then delusions that aliens are trying to kill you.

I sometimes sit and marvel at my own genius as I read this column on a Monday.

I’ve even wondered if the leaders of the world, Obama, Brown and anyone else who’s available, will one day invite me to a meeting where they’ll listen intently as I read them my column entitled “The Art of Saving the Planet, Sorting out the Middle East and other Pressing Problems”. I’d better get it written just in case.

Hoodwinking yourself is all well and good, but the ride you’re taking yourself on can grind to an abrupt and upsetting halt if you come up against someone who attempts to slap you round the face with reality.

Closing your eyes and shaking your head so you can’t really hear them is a defence I’ve used mumerous times.

It will probably happen eventually because it can be a bit painful putting up with people who are really deluded, especially if they keep coming out with ridiculous statements.

Like the woman at work who told me she’d never met a man so cocky and self-assured with the ladies.

Astonishing or what? I said: “You’re only saying that because you fancy me.”




Next week: The art of being flexible