Getting pregnant is costing eggstra

LIFE AND OTHER BITS:

THERE was a time when just popping out for half a dozen eggs meant that a breakfast fry up or toast soldiers was on the menu. The eggs came back in a dimpled cardboard box and all had a little lion stamped on the side.

Not so any more. Now women are popping out to provide the eggs (remember when it used to be hens?) and for £800 a time, which, you’ll agree, is hardly chickenfeed (sorry).

The price for eggs has gone up from £250 to try to ensure that British women who want to get pregnant are given British eggs (there is no mention of the lion mark) and not eggs from some foreign parts such as Hungary, Slovenia and the Czech Republic where unscrupulous — but very rich —medics are happy to plant half a dozen with the obvious risk of multiple births and bankruptcy due to the weekly Mothercare bill.

The Americans, needless to say, have an altogether different take on all this. Never mind £250 or even £800, in the States, if you are very pretty in that toothy American way and are smart (and being female helps, of course), then you can get more than £20,000 for donating your eggs.

And they said it was the goose that laid the golden egg!

Soon, of course, childless couples may be able to buy eggs on e-Bay, not so silly when you consider that sperm is already available on the internet, but probably not at anything like £800 a go, and quite how that works I’ll leave to your imagination.

Under current fertility policy (no, I didn’t know we had one either) sperm can be used to start only 10 families — a bit like the baby boomers currently living on some of our estates — but that could be increased to 20, increasing the risk, so the experts say, of half- siblings unwittingly having children with each other. Which is the same as half-wits making 20 women pregnant.


WE are definitely lucky to have Chris Davies as our Euro MP because he has spoken more often and tabled more questions than any other North-West members and as he’s tucked away in the darker reaches of Europe we do not have to listen to them.


But we cannot deny Chris his dedication and should be grateful for the efforts he makes on our behalf.

Chris sets a shining example to Paul Nuttall, our UKIP representative in Europe. Paul got the award for being absent from the European Parliament on half of the days that the parliament was in session.

Of course, he will only claim half his pay and half his expenses, won’t he?


FINAL WORD: Women are still complaining that the most annoying fault with which we men (wee-wee men, perhaps) blight their lives is leaving the toilet seat up. Get a life girls. Or should we start a list?